Most viable career paths right now:
-Police goon
-Tech fraudster
-Health care crank
-Regime propagandist
-Dentist (unrelated to the others, it just pays well)

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You forgot internet donation whore otherwise known as an "influencer"
Looks like career changes maybe needed in these hot areas
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- Repossession person
- paramilitary cosplay vendor
I don't really know how it works but I'm making a pretty decent living by having a small dick but acting like I have a big one
Don't forget purveyor of death!
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Egg timer………still waiting.
-Lawyer
-plumber

people be shitting, we'll always need plumbers
well we might lose the running water and sewage system but somebody has to dig the holes. that's honest work right there
Never trusted dentists
Enforcement goon for the powers that be has always been a well-compensated position throughout recent history.
what about ragtime musician
Also court reporter. Pay is good, easy to learn, plenty of work do to the overwhelming evil currently going on!
Dentist is just another flavor of tech fraudster
This is silly. I made my money by joining the up and coming field of "guy in gray spandex walking around that Elon Musk claims is an autonomous robot"
I'm pretty sure that's what all us little people will be, faceless dehumanized servants to the rich at their parties
Wait til the programmers revolt and the robots want to unionize.
Get them all in the same place and record it. Tentative title, “Is It Safe? House”
With the healthcare cranks railing against fluoride, one could start to be suspicious of dentists 🧐

It's that 10th dentist I know it!
Dentist is going to be amazing and gross when they ban fluoride in the water.
Dentist...like in Marathon Man 🛠️
*provided you're not attractive enough to monetize your sexuality
without fluoridated water, DDS will indeed pay well again.
Influencers are doing well, if you want to well out completely.
Star Wars economy
Seems to fit right in. I hate going to the dentist.
I’d like to hear more about this regime propagandist position.
Don't forget
-Grifter
-Non-functioning alcoholic
-In-the-moment fiction speaker
I think there’s a real calling right now for pastors who embody all of the above.
- Mar-a-Lago member
- Couch repairer
If Medicare is severely cut, all those old people with Medicare Advantage, which has dental coverage, might lose their dental coverage.

Besides which, the cheapest procedure a dentist can do is an extraction. As a dentist, get ready to do a lot of extractions.
2, 3, and 4 are often the same job!
Don’t forget preacher. The scam that can never be disproven!
Dentist has a little too much science in it right now
You missed - Professional Charlatan (also pays quite well)
idk, I had zero issues with my wisdom teeth (late 30s) and they were ADAMANT that they needed to come out…

not a country ending level scam like the others, but perhaps they are just aspiring to that level
Police goon is funny
HVAC a solid option too...
I feel like plumber is evergreen.
There’s an electrician shortage
Veterinarian also. Pays well and being bought up by PE all over the place. Added benefit of helping animals if you're into thats sort of thing.
Cost of schooling and high stress rates can mitigate the pay.
Disclaimer: I'm not a vet (work with them) and don't know what PE is (Physical Education?).
private equity
Oh, that tracks. Thanks!
And funeral director also bought up by PE.
wow. I guess everything is being hollowed out by them. depressing.
He kept us safe.
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the whole luxury teeth thing means it's particularly related
Would’ve substituted “sycophant” for “propagandist” but that’s really just quibbling over details
Dentist IS related, but it'll be after all fluoride is removed from public water systems.
Dentists have the highest rate of suicide.
The problem with regime propagandist jobs is, they're part-time, no benefit jobs without WFH potential: "contract counter-protestor" and "background shill" and the like. The good, full-time, remote jobs, like "internet troll" have already been outsourced to Russia...
-Farm land realtor, must speak Russian.
Dropshipping dunce
Nation of marks who think credentialed professionals are sheep.
My parents wanted me to be a dentist so bad they shit-talked every other job I ever wanted as a kid until finally I went to Fine Arts college, dropped out, and became a butcher

Bet you’d be ok with a veterinarian kid now, dad!!!
Dentist might not after all the healthcare cuts!
Tuberculosis coach
Everyone needs their teeth.
But no 1 can afford it
Especially after the goons pay a visit
Crypto influencer or OnlyFans model.
Raw milk promoter.
With raw milk, bird flu and dismantling of public health, Plague doctor is an upcoming career.
alt nutritionist
Also: Crypto con artist.
Dentists are gonna be making bank with RFK
Dentistry will boom as RFKJr removes fluoridation from drinking water.
When I was a kid fluoridation was something the cities had, whereas we lived in the country and drank well water. Everyone in my family has suffered dental problems their entire lives, we had so many fillings and crowns and replacement teeth that to this day we are all terrified of dentists.
You forgot mortician. Recession-proof!
And all those Boomers!
- Youth Pastor (they keep getting arrested)
- Back-Alley Abortionist
- Biden Laptop Truther
- Elon Musk’s Human Shield Baby
- News Program Pro-Trump Flak
Honestly dentists are rapidly heading to the same spot as chiropractors
-Resistance fighter
-Poster maker
-Independent journalist
-Organizer
-Activist
-Punk
-Musician
-Librarian
-Artist
-Lawyer
-Shitposter
-Cybersecurity professional
-Historian
An optimist!!
I’d like to had farmer and chef to the list. We need people to grow and preserve food
YES!
+ teachers
lots of dentists are health care cranks, two birds one stone
I was gonna say, as a certified Dentistry Hater - dentists are 90% grifter pieces of shit that wanted to get rich and 10% people that care about patients.
Bad news about Dentists

https://youtu.be/Tp66TBeQrbQ
If being a dentist pays so well, then how come they always look down in the mouth?? 😠
They all need an accountant 🤷🏻‍♀️
Dentist is highly related to the others
When I see some doctor that's batshit, 50/50 shot it's a dentist. IDK what it is about working in people's mouths all day makes a person crazy, or that only crazy people want to do it. Probably both.

Maybe it's all that N₂O exposure?

Chiropractors are worse, but they're also not doctors.
Dentist and anesthesiologist have the best hours.
Right wing think tanks are always hiring people that can think of new ways to loot and pillage.
Does AI Prompt Artist fall under Tech Fraudster?
Oh indubitably
Internment camp Commandant is also very sought after.
I'm liking Smuggler.
Yeah, if you haven’t ever spoken to a dentist about politics, you should.
Lemon makes water electrically basic even though it's an acid; this helps balance your internal sanguine pH to help with melancholia and misbalanced phlogiston.
What about being chinese?
LOL
Plumber?
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Maybe dentist is related to the others....
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Police Department Special Gooning Squad
🏆
I’m a glass half full person:
- Smuggler
- rich eater (there’s a prize at the bottom of the bag!)
- VPN companies
- comedians
Plumber, don’t forget Plumber, those dudes can charge whatever they like when it’s 3:00 am and your house smells like sewage
thank god the courts are going to disappear so they can take that literally
surge pricing (your house smells like shit)
I'm not so sure about that last one...
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if you desire a senior administration job
consider adding a few of the following keywords to your resume-

Dog killer
Deceased bear cub disposal
Donated to the wall
Felon
Gullibility A+ level
Limited vocabulary
MAGA
Pled guilty
Prison time
Science denier
Served prison time
Sex offender
- Fake tan spray-on technician + an assistant

- Hairpiece aesthetician

- Babysitter / Wet Nurse

- Personal Embalmer / Mortician?
Sorry despite your impressive application they were looking for

ELECTION SKEPTIC
surely I, one of the *good* dog killers, could make a real change
Dentists can't get paid by insurance companies.

I guess we are left with all the not so good choices. [Sigh]
Police WHAT?
Unemployed ppl can't afford the Dentist, that one will fall off the list..add idiot dictator puppet man
- Grossly underqualified government agency head.
💙✊💙 This is a huge amount of resources for numerous and varied ways to fight and defend against trump’s regime. 💙✊💙

https://linktr.ee/revolution2025
States are removing fluoride from water so dentists about to be banging too
The health care cranks are removing fluoride from water so dentist is pretty tied in.
How do you combine all of them?
Bulk steak cuts buyer
Information oligarch
Pressure point finder
I have a conscience and i don't like sticking my hand in peoples' mouths. Is there anything else I can do?
This is the worst TTRPG I've ever played.
They should pardon Elizabeth Holmes imo. She’d be a superstar in current America.
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Queen ahead of her time
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Could’ve been HHS secretary instead of rfk jr
Her idea was great! Give her more time to do it right!
Elon gets way more leeway than a woman ever could
Tech fraudsters have to be white and male. She tried to elbow her way into the tech fraud club without those necessary qualifications. Uppity.
maybe after she had elon’s next kid
Don't give them ideas.
Dentists are the philanthropists/convoyists funding the other four.
You forgot all around asshole
Caries vaccine would make the last occupation not as profitable.
Dentists are just a different kind of fraudster
dentists are the most morally corrupt ppl on this list
dentist falls under health care crank (tooth chiropractic)
Excuse me, as a crypto scammer, I am very upset to be left off this list. Please remedy immediately.
-meme coin dev
That one falls under tech fraudster too.
But is it really fraud if you're doing it through a website with "pump and dump" right in the name?
Well one thing I found in good times and bad. People sue each other.
A process server is a recession proof business.
All theives somehow.
(but just as evil)
I read the fourth one as "Ragtime propagandist" and honestly, that might work
Obligatory
Social media influencer Ponzi schemer?
You joke but when Secretary Brainworms gets fluoride banned, dentist will be headed to the top
this, dentists will get unlimited demand, so much so that most united staters won't be able to afford it, keeping their teeth will be a privilege reserved for citizens who can afford houses and out of pocket healthcare
It’s already like that 😞
No shit.
Fascist boot-licker
At first, I was thinking that right-wing crankery hadn't yet reached dentistry, but then I remembered that being scared of fluoride was a thing.
Maybe all the ob-gyns can pivot to dentist
Hustle mindset is to be a dentist/health care crank. Play both sides so you always come out on top.
Two new dentist offices opened on my block since last November, whose to say if they’re unrelated to the rise of kleptofascism after all